There were two toilets side by side and we thought that was weird but then we noticed that one of them was different with a kind of miniature geyser in a porcelain bowl. Olga had heard about this sort of thing and said it was called a “bootay” which is what they use on the Upper East Side to clean their ass. I was for sure that she was kidding me but I couldn’t think of another possible use for such a thing. It was our friends’ hotel room but they weren’t there, we had just stopped by to pick up our stuff. The whole thing was really fun because we had to feign an attitude of righteous self-entitlement and aggrieved world-weariness in order to make it past the lobby. The sun was setting and we spent a long time leaning out the window looking at all of the stuff you can see from a penthouse hotel room. There was a super-elegant family in an apartment across from us that particularly caught our interest, like all of the infants were wearing suits and evening gowns. Also we listened to some music too and invented a new dance even but the thing that really captivated us was the bootay and we spent a lot of time trying to figure it out, like how do you sit on it and such, and then a sudden spout of ass-water shot up into my face and I shrieked and ran around the room while olga laughed and laughed.
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