Remember that deranged cobbler that we almost ended up sharing an office with? Well I had a pair of boots that needed re-soling and I figured he was just the guy for the job. It took some doing to get him to emerge from behind his pole but I finally coaxed him out by producing the worn-out ol’ boots themselves which he studied from every angle as if appraising a valuable artifact and then quoted me the low price of $35. I said mister cobbler you have a deal but he was nowhere to be seen and neither were my boots. Did I mention that he has a droopy tobacco-stained moustache and looks like the guy who built Pinocchio. Actually he sounds like him too, maybe that’s why he is constantly hiding behind a pole? But I figured that a guy with such a demeanor would do a real bang-up workmanlike job on them ol’ boots, really applying the elbow-grease and getting down to brass tacks. A guy with a long history of cobbling why he's probably cobbled just about everything there is to cobble! When I got the boots back there were a few small gaps where the soles weren’t quite fully adhered but I figured, if that old-world tobacco-chewing moustache-drooping stubby-fingered incomprehensible stained-undershirt Pinocchio-building son-of-a-gun couldn’t do it no-one could! And then almost immediately the soles practically started to fall off the boots and I am now realizing that the cobbler did about the most sloppy half-assed slipshod slapdash job I’ve ever seen. Those ol’ boots, why they’re just barely cobbled together!
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